If you grew up with abuse, addiction, untreated mental illness, or some other form of childhood trauma, your needs were not met by the adults who were supposed to take care of you.
In order to survive, you learned to deny or suppress your needs, or perhaps meet them yourself. You may have even been forced to meet the needs of others. For example, when a parent is in active addiction, a child might start taking care of their siblings--or be expected to meet the physical or emotional demands of the parent.
Denying your own needs for so long may leave you feeling like you don't know what you truly want. If you feel this way, you are not alone. But there are ways to reconnect with yourself and discover what you need, now that it is safe to do so. In fact, beginning to put your needs first is an act of rebellion--you are saying, "No more! It's time for me to be in control of my own life, and to live it on my terms."
Making this statement is a healthy and necessary part of the early healing process. And if you are looking for some assistance as you take this step, our April 27, 2024 podcast can provide some suggestions.